Over the weekend I have come to the conclusion that the Christian walk isn't always easy or perfect. This shouldn't be a surprise to me but unfortunately it was. I have struggled for many days now feeling hopeless and discouraged. My thoughts have been of loneliness, is God really using me, is the work here all in vain, or why are things not going the way I want it to go?Sometimes what we want in life isn't always what God wants. The outcomes in life could be far from the "happy ever after" endings. This weekend I came to Manila, just to get a few things taken care of- paying the extension of my visa, picking up my new debit card because my other one expired, and checking up on Cristine. On the nauseating bus ride to Manila I received a text from Precy, Cristines mom, and it read :
"We are here now at Philippines Childrens Hospital and the doctor said they dont want Cristine to be operated also... they are the same as PGH ( Philippines General Hospital). I've tried to ask them to just give Cristine even the shant to drain the water of the head but they dont want to do anything because it can cause complication. I'm sorry maam but Im also disappointed , we really love this baby"
There are no words to say how I felt . How could this 7 month old baby not receive help? I thought for sure God would heal her considering how He brought together so many people from America and the Philippines to raise money for this little girl and both hospitals have rejected her. This coming Monday the family will come home in Pinamalayan where I am staying.
Everytime I think about the situation I feel sick to my stomach. I first of all just want to thank everyone who did support. I don't think this was in vain and I think every detail, from the people that supported to the timing of how we met this family, was all in God's plan. Please continue to pray for the family as this will be very hard for them!
Even though things in life may not go according to how we want it: death in a family, loss of a job, aquiring an illness, etc. and even though I am not perfect, not always having the answers, feeling lonely, helpless, and discouraged- I am thankful to have a God that is faithful, just, merciful, almighty, and most of all a God that loves me just the way I am!
"We are here now at Philippines Childrens Hospital and the doctor said they dont want Cristine to be operated also... they are the same as PGH ( Philippines General Hospital). I've tried to ask them to just give Cristine even the shant to drain the water of the head but they dont want to do anything because it can cause complication. I'm sorry maam but Im also disappointed , we really love this baby"
There are no words to say how I felt . How could this 7 month old baby not receive help? I thought for sure God would heal her considering how He brought together so many people from America and the Philippines to raise money for this little girl and both hospitals have rejected her. This coming Monday the family will come home in Pinamalayan where I am staying.
Everytime I think about the situation I feel sick to my stomach. I first of all just want to thank everyone who did support. I don't think this was in vain and I think every detail, from the people that supported to the timing of how we met this family, was all in God's plan. Please continue to pray for the family as this will be very hard for them!
Even though things in life may not go according to how we want it: death in a family, loss of a job, aquiring an illness, etc. and even though I am not perfect, not always having the answers, feeling lonely, helpless, and discouraged- I am thankful to have a God that is faithful, just, merciful, almighty, and most of all a God that loves me just the way I am!
Christie. I'm so sorry about Christine. I, like you, do not understand how this could be but unfortunately it is not America there. We have to continue to trust God in this as in every area of our lives. Even when it means loss, sorry - but even then He is there to hold us up. Love you, hang in there. You may not feel like you are doing anything there but you are. Just go back and read your blog and you will see. Praying for you always. Karla
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